Could you please pick up the pieces for me ?

Pieces of what ?

Pieces of my heart, that had shattered into million pieces.

X(

Sad. Yeah truly sad and pathetic.

Well it had been there on the ground for quite some time already, but everyday. I tried picking piece by piece. Glue it all back together. And lately . . . bla bla bla.

so instead of writing this piece of garbage i decided to write something else.

In order for me to get back on my feet. I tried so many things. and one of it is like fasting. but instead of holding back on food, you try to hold back on something else. maybe soft addiction ? from the moment my world come tumbling down.

I start to put in my mind or hold myself back from doing anything that could make me sad or unhappy or give negative effects to me.

One ;

NO CONTACT. THRU PHONE, TEXT, EMAIL, COMMENT IN FACEBOOK OR BLOG FOR 27 DAYS.

Two ;

NO STALKING HIS EMAIL, FACEBOOK, BLOG FOR 27 DAYS.

Three ;

NO THINKING ABOUT HIM EXCESSIVELY, THINKING WHY DOES THIS HAPPEN ! FOR 27 DAYS.

The first one, was a success. I did it. and until now, theres no urge to do so, for now. maybe there was, and i did. but the email didnt get through so. it doesnt count and that was after the 27 days.

The second one, is still fresh. This is the third day i think or maybe the fourth. but i am trying hard, very very hard not to stalk him anymore. hahahaha.

The third one, sounds impossible to me. but i really need to try anyhow. so the key word on the third task would be. BERSERAH. let it be. If i question who what where why how and everything, Im like questioning HIS power. Since things like this are all outside my control. So the key to success in this particular task is BERSERAH OR LET IT BE.

The thing is. some people just wonder why don't you just do it all at the same time? why do i need to take 27x3 = 81 days to at least crawl back on track ? Well the answer is easy. 20 % is because I don't want to do so, because i just love it when i feel all sad and gloomy and its like my fav thing to do. to cry an ocean of tears and blablabla. and the other 80 % is i know my limits, and how far I can push myself. And I need baby steps to do all this. I can't just do everything at the same time cause I spend 365x3 = I dont have a calculator to count how many days, that I woke up to the goodmorning and I slept by the goodnight with him. So if i say its easy to forget him. I am lying. CAUSE ITS NOT EASY. But I will never give up I'll not make a fool of myself cause I am better than that. and i will not let myself to waste, theres so many things i can do.

Actually I dont really have anything to say. But i need to stay awake. so i am actually writing something for me to post but my brain is not working right. Forgive me .

Goodbye.